Brisbane Trip part 2
Marty and Lyndell my gorgeous friends from High School its always nice to put a face to the story so this is them.
Okay Friday yet another shitty sleep.
Ben was awake with me most of the night I am going to have to go to Doctor as I cant stand this pain I have gone through a box of pretty strong meds the last few days and I hate it.
Injection is done and for some reason it stung like B#*"^ard but anyway its done.
I refuse to dwell on that today.
So back to my Brisy trip.
Dana and I left Kels and headed for the shopping centre at Toombul which just happens to be a 5min drive from the Cows house(aunt) we had a look around and enjoyed a fresh juice all the while my tummy doing somersaults at the thought of meeting with the witch so I dragged out the shopping for a long while.
Meanwhile I had another call from Marty- are you still coming over today?
Me- sure we are just at the shops.
Marty- Do you want to come for dinner.
Me-Why not its not as if I am angry or anything and were kool aren't we? How you feeling? Marty- Shaz are sure I didnt say anythin?
Me- Yes honey I am kidding, I will see you all soon.
Marty and I went to school together also and have been friends for a very long time and he married Lyndell my best gal friend from school so its really kool havin them both together.(except when they fight cause I have try to stay neutral) Mmmm well I dont really I tell it how I see it and he accepts that. I have spoken about Lyndell and I just love her she is my sweet friend who has an amzing relationship with my girls.
Anyway we finish stalling at the shops and we decide to just do it, I immediately start to feel ill my legs are weak and I feel the need to find a toilet (IBS is a curse when your stressed).
I hate public toilets I am almost phobic, they really suck and especially for anything other than number ones. Dana says cant you wait? I cant wait truly I must be nervous because I can always wait but not now I gotta go. So we head for the restrooms, there is no way I am going into the one that has like 20 loos in it no way. I am going to find the disabled one. Dana is now nearly peeing herself laughing at watching me squirm as she knows I don't use public toilets and her amusement at my distress doesn't make me smile and she tries to control herself.
I can still hear you Dana as I lock the door and a muffled sorry is heard through the door followed by a snorting laughing sound outside the door. Your not too old to smack you know, I yell as her giggles get louder. She is now in hysterics and I start laughing also, this is just ridiculous I really need to get over this loathing for public toilets.
That being over and Dana getting an evil eye followed by a Pfffttttt and a burst out of laughter we head to the car. I am now shaking at the prospect of coming face to face with this woman.
We pull up and there is no sign of anyone. I was syked and ready to speak up.
The memories came flooding back of my dear Uncle and his witty sense of humour and also his look of discontentment when he lived here with this woman.
I turned off the car and we got out, the gate was chained and so I yelled out. A dog I have never seen came screaming down the stairs and headed towards us bearing teeth and barking. Dan just looked at me as if I am not going in there. I stood silently looking at the stairs waiting for her to come out. She appeared and called the dog looking at me with a combined look of dismay and guilt and what the F*#k does she want look she seemed nervous , good she damn well should be after what she did.
She told us to wait as she had to lock this dog up. We waited a while before she headed down the stairs. Slowly she approached and said a cordial hello this is a surprise. I said a shaky Hi and we just stood there, looking at each other. I finally said umm well I was in Brisy so I thought Id come and have a coffee. There was a response of fear and questioning in her eyes. She finally said I will have to lock the dog up better and she disappeared leaving us at the gate for another 5 mins.
Dana whispered, She doesn't want us here mum and I replied with Mmmm I think your right but we are not leaving. We finally went upstairs and made small talk.
Now, I have been in some sticky situations, I have been in some really awful situations and I have came out of most of these either fighting or happy with the out come.
This time.............I choked. I cant believe it until the end, I finally asked if she would give me a copy of his birth certificate and death certificate and will.
She got up and walked into the kitchen ignoring the question Dana looked at me with venom in her eyes for this woman who betrayed her mumma and I choked. I quickly asked one more time as she was taking our cups and clearing away as a cue for us to leave. She then proceeded to say she would once again post it to me and I said nothing but okay.
Can u believe it what a wimp I am. All I said was okay, bloody hell she was right there in front of me and all I said was okay, Dana was furious but I shook my head at her as if not to say a word, she obliged. We left and I just cried.
Why cant I stick up for myself these days why didn't I let Dana at least say her piece, she is after all a part of me and can stick up for herself and she is a lot more diplomatic than me.
I just couldn't do it and I didn't, I couldn't, I just left without knowing anything except that she would never send me a copy and I would never know the truth and that I would never pursue this any further.
I am ashamed of myself for being so weak and I am embarrassed to say I lost my nerve.
I am strong and honest and forthright. I have never been backward in coming forward but this situation has destroyed that part of me, these drugs confuse me mentally and the drugs that counteract that, leave me with little real feeling or fight in my spirit.
This coming from a young woman who has been raped, molested, ran over, stabbed and been in more fights than I care to remember in the end I was usually walking away better off than the person who chose to try to hurt me. (all of that is for another post) But I am just not vengeful and she wasn't attacking me so I was lost. I have never backed down from anyone but this situation has floored me, I just cant believe it really.
If you were to ask anyone who knows me well they wouldn't believe I have let it turn out like this. I am not as tough as I once physically or mentally was but maybe its that there are things more important to me than that.
I am not as volatile as I once was and that can be viewed as both good and bad. I am content that my integrity is in order and what goes around comes around. I have a clear conscious and am at peace with my past, my future and my life.It sux that I will never know. But I am okay with that now.
I had my chance and I passed it over, it was my responsibility to change my circumstances. I relinquished that so I only have myself to blame now. I will have to put that to rest and settle for the outcome.
We left and headed to Marty and Lyndells for dinner they couldn't believe my weakness as they have never seen that side of me, but they love and know me well enough to have not carried on with that conversation instead we talked about everything but and had a great dinner.
Dan and I left heading back to her house where I dropped her off as I was going to sleep at Kels. I think by the time kel and I finished chatting and she went to sleep I had taken four sleeping tablets that clearly weren't working and so I wandered around the house for hours. I may have got an hours sleep max so that comes to about 4 hours in 2 days. I really don't sleep well anyway but I really do not sleep well away from home or Ben another little quirk I need to control.
To say I looked like Hell was an understatement but I had to pick Dana up and take her into the city for an interview so I showered and left.
I will fill you in on our trip to the city tomorrow it was nice and almost trouble free except there is one more toilet tale to tell and where did that street go?
Stay well all.
Peace and Health to All XXX
So back to my Brisy trip.
Dana and I left Kels and headed for the shopping centre at Toombul which just happens to be a 5min drive from the Cows house(aunt) we had a look around and enjoyed a fresh juice all the while my tummy doing somersaults at the thought of meeting with the witch so I dragged out the shopping for a long while.
Meanwhile I had another call from Marty- are you still coming over today?
Me- sure we are just at the shops.
Marty- Do you want to come for dinner.
Me-Why not its not as if I am angry or anything and were kool aren't we? How you feeling? Marty- Shaz are sure I didnt say anythin?
Me- Yes honey I am kidding, I will see you all soon.
Marty and I went to school together also and have been friends for a very long time and he married Lyndell my best gal friend from school so its really kool havin them both together.(except when they fight cause I have try to stay neutral) Mmmm well I dont really I tell it how I see it and he accepts that. I have spoken about Lyndell and I just love her she is my sweet friend who has an amzing relationship with my girls.
Anyway we finish stalling at the shops and we decide to just do it, I immediately start to feel ill my legs are weak and I feel the need to find a toilet (IBS is a curse when your stressed).
I hate public toilets I am almost phobic, they really suck and especially for anything other than number ones. Dana says cant you wait? I cant wait truly I must be nervous because I can always wait but not now I gotta go. So we head for the restrooms, there is no way I am going into the one that has like 20 loos in it no way. I am going to find the disabled one. Dana is now nearly peeing herself laughing at watching me squirm as she knows I don't use public toilets and her amusement at my distress doesn't make me smile and she tries to control herself.
I can still hear you Dana as I lock the door and a muffled sorry is heard through the door followed by a snorting laughing sound outside the door. Your not too old to smack you know, I yell as her giggles get louder. She is now in hysterics and I start laughing also, this is just ridiculous I really need to get over this loathing for public toilets.
That being over and Dana getting an evil eye followed by a Pfffttttt and a burst out of laughter we head to the car. I am now shaking at the prospect of coming face to face with this woman.
We pull up and there is no sign of anyone. I was syked and ready to speak up.
The memories came flooding back of my dear Uncle and his witty sense of humour and also his look of discontentment when he lived here with this woman.
I turned off the car and we got out, the gate was chained and so I yelled out. A dog I have never seen came screaming down the stairs and headed towards us bearing teeth and barking. Dan just looked at me as if I am not going in there. I stood silently looking at the stairs waiting for her to come out. She appeared and called the dog looking at me with a combined look of dismay and guilt and what the F*#k does she want look she seemed nervous , good she damn well should be after what she did.
She told us to wait as she had to lock this dog up. We waited a while before she headed down the stairs. Slowly she approached and said a cordial hello this is a surprise. I said a shaky Hi and we just stood there, looking at each other. I finally said umm well I was in Brisy so I thought Id come and have a coffee. There was a response of fear and questioning in her eyes. She finally said I will have to lock the dog up better and she disappeared leaving us at the gate for another 5 mins.
Dana whispered, She doesn't want us here mum and I replied with Mmmm I think your right but we are not leaving. We finally went upstairs and made small talk.
Now, I have been in some sticky situations, I have been in some really awful situations and I have came out of most of these either fighting or happy with the out come.
This time.............I choked. I cant believe it until the end, I finally asked if she would give me a copy of his birth certificate and death certificate and will.
She got up and walked into the kitchen ignoring the question Dana looked at me with venom in her eyes for this woman who betrayed her mumma and I choked. I quickly asked one more time as she was taking our cups and clearing away as a cue for us to leave. She then proceeded to say she would once again post it to me and I said nothing but okay.
Can u believe it what a wimp I am. All I said was okay, bloody hell she was right there in front of me and all I said was okay, Dana was furious but I shook my head at her as if not to say a word, she obliged. We left and I just cried.
Why cant I stick up for myself these days why didn't I let Dana at least say her piece, she is after all a part of me and can stick up for herself and she is a lot more diplomatic than me.
I just couldn't do it and I didn't, I couldn't, I just left without knowing anything except that she would never send me a copy and I would never know the truth and that I would never pursue this any further.
I am ashamed of myself for being so weak and I am embarrassed to say I lost my nerve.
I am strong and honest and forthright. I have never been backward in coming forward but this situation has destroyed that part of me, these drugs confuse me mentally and the drugs that counteract that, leave me with little real feeling or fight in my spirit.
This coming from a young woman who has been raped, molested, ran over, stabbed and been in more fights than I care to remember in the end I was usually walking away better off than the person who chose to try to hurt me. (all of that is for another post) But I am just not vengeful and she wasn't attacking me so I was lost. I have never backed down from anyone but this situation has floored me, I just cant believe it really.
If you were to ask anyone who knows me well they wouldn't believe I have let it turn out like this. I am not as tough as I once physically or mentally was but maybe its that there are things more important to me than that.
I am not as volatile as I once was and that can be viewed as both good and bad. I am content that my integrity is in order and what goes around comes around. I have a clear conscious and am at peace with my past, my future and my life.It sux that I will never know. But I am okay with that now.
I had my chance and I passed it over, it was my responsibility to change my circumstances. I relinquished that so I only have myself to blame now. I will have to put that to rest and settle for the outcome.
We left and headed to Marty and Lyndells for dinner they couldn't believe my weakness as they have never seen that side of me, but they love and know me well enough to have not carried on with that conversation instead we talked about everything but and had a great dinner.
Dan and I left heading back to her house where I dropped her off as I was going to sleep at Kels. I think by the time kel and I finished chatting and she went to sleep I had taken four sleeping tablets that clearly weren't working and so I wandered around the house for hours. I may have got an hours sleep max so that comes to about 4 hours in 2 days. I really don't sleep well anyway but I really do not sleep well away from home or Ben another little quirk I need to control.
To say I looked like Hell was an understatement but I had to pick Dana up and take her into the city for an interview so I showered and left.
I will fill you in on our trip to the city tomorrow it was nice and almost trouble free except there is one more toilet tale to tell and where did that street go?
Stay well all.
Peace and Health to All XXX
posted by Shaz @ Friday, May 18, 2007
8 Comments
8 Comments:
Your friends are really gorgeous!Lucky you!And there cannot be anything more cool than marrying your onetime best friend.Friends are precious.Check out some of the friendship stuff that I've posted on my site.Cheers!
Shaz, every time you let us see a glimpse into your past,it truly hurts my heart that you have been through so much torment in your life and yet look at who you are... You have more guts and character than anyone I have ever known. Why is it that you are still being made to suffer this terrible physical pain you are going through? Life truly can be a bitch!
On a lighter note, its good to put a face to Marty, that last post cracked me up. And since I've already used up so much space, I agree with Robert, friends are very precious indeed.
Ummm who's the guy under the picture of Marty and Lyndell? HA HA HA
A good tactician never goes to battle unless they have to.
Releasing Dana on her would not have been prudent at the time especially if this could be solved without any unpleasntries, besides, remember the dog.
There will be time for that if it has to come to that point.
You showed her that you are willing to show up at her door now unless she wants you to return she should send you the copies you requested.
Now I have a question.
Here in Canada a will, birth and death dcertificate in public knowledge andcoudl be obtained by anyone willing to pay for it at city hall.
Can't you do the same there?
I think you did the right thing.
Have a nice weekend
Shazzy, pet, don't be hard on yourself about the aunt from hell. You've always come across to me as a person who trusts her instincts and is never far wrong when she does. I believe that your judgment was right for whatever reason and in that split second you made your decision, there will have been a reason even if you'll never know what it was. I trust your intuition, irrespective of the medication.
Of course it truly does suck though that you will remain in the dark on your uncle's wishes but you never know... maybe some day.
Your friends look and sound like a great bunch... but wow you must have been wrecked when you got home.
I can't wait for the next instalment of the Brisy saga :)
Vxxx
My friends are gorgeous and I miss them terribly since the move.
Walker: I can get the birth and death certificate for myself but I kinda put the three into the 1 context so she didnt think I just wanted the will.
A bit stupid cause she is hiding something and she really was adament that its all hers, she yelled it at me the first time I asked. I cant get the will as it is a private solicitor whom I dont have the name of, not the public trustee, so unless the estate is very large it is not public knowledge unless requested by my solicitor to her and so on, which I wanted to avoid that kind of drama as its not about money but principle.I just dont know why after what she did I want to avoid doing that I refuse to be seen as a grubber because I have seen how ferral people get and I am so not like that but she has robbed me of so much more than money because thats not what I want I just want to know his words as he told me I was there.
This is the post if you dont know the full story.Its kinda like one of your bizare family twists. lol
http://shazz27.blogspot.com/2006/12/there-is-not-title-to-this-it-makes-no.html
After reading the post you directed me to, the way I see it is that your uncle made two mistakes.
The first was to marry this woman and the second was not to divorce her when he had the chance.
As his wife she has the upper hand in this and your fight will be an uphill battle.
I can see her saying she lost his will at some stage.
Have you looked into any rights you may have as a relative?
Putting your uncles ashes over her dead husbands grave was fucken so not right.
I would go down there with a hose and wash them off.
I can see why you’re so frustration in all of this and I would be in there now to deal with this.
The way I see it is she tried to erase him totally, like he never existed and you are as reminder of him.
She moved in quickly and got rid of everything except what SHE wanted, plus this also gets rid of any evidence that might keep her away from claiming his property.
She is a very shrewd woman and knew what she was doing.
How did she end up with his will and is there a possibility of another being around stating different or did she destroy that when she found it in his place after he had died?
So many questions and this is not what you need right now in your condition.
I don’t know if you have to register a will there but if you do I would check and see if your uncle had registered another will since he separated from this witch and maybe get a lawyer or talk to one to see what legal grounds you have to stand on.
It sucks when there are people like this in the world.
Good luck with this.
Oh Shaz how dreadful for you to have to face all this. i'm so glad you had someone with you.
Of course you couldn't tackle her when you're not well and I guess your fighting spirit will be back when you're off the meds.
Gorgeous looking friends by the way.
Angela
Darling sistah ... we fight the battles we can and sometimes in not fighting we save our strength for something else. The witch will pay for her sins no matter what. It was so good talking to you. (By the way, the story about the toilet is priceless!) Lots and lots of love to you, deb
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